putting my heart on my… scale

There’s a black square on the bathroom floor that presents a dilemma during my morning routine: to step on the scale or not? As a woman pursuing wellness through dieting and exercise, I know that I need to measure my progress and press on toward that healthy goal. As a former bulimic, I worry that weighing myself will become an obsession.

There was a time when the numbers on the scale would tell me not only how much I weighed but also how much I was worth. The lower the number on the screen, the greater my chances of being valued. I shudder at the memory of the darkness that gripped my mind and twisted me into an emotionally crippled, physically broken and spiritually dull woman.

By grace, she is no more. The gospel of Jesus Christ healed my mind and set my soul free. I am not her. I do not think as she thought and I will not live as she lived. I place my trust in the transforming power of my God that by His Spirit, I can seek Him first and will not be consumed by the task of caring for my body. I humbly submit to the godly women in my life who hold me accountable to both my wellness goals and to the new pattern of thinking that places the glory of God above my personal goals.

 I cannot allow that scale to define me; not by what it says and certainly not because I fear that I will allow myself to be defined by what it says. Redemption means that I place my feet- and my heart- on the scale and trust Jesus.

“…for at one time you were in darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children on light.” Ephesians 5:8

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